Microsoft Postpones Plan To Introduce At Least One Original Idea

By:Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com

Imagine the complexities, not to mention the complexes, attendant to being the world’s largest software manufacturer when your principal original idea so far has been a cheaper price than Apple?

Microsoft may well qualify as the American company to achieve the most success without introducing to the needy world at least one original idea, unless, of course, a low-down price can be construed as such a welcome contribution.

Let’s look at the spotty history of, not innovation, but imitation.

Remember when the Mac had point and click, drop-down menus, and the capacity to keep more than one program open at a time but eddying Microsoft didn’t?

Yet, ever resourceful but never innovative, Microsoft managed to imitate the features in ways that kept Gates and company in front of bars and, voila!, the world had Windows and then Office.

And what about search? Google virtually invented it. Yahoo got into the game by acquiring Overture. Finally, we have Microsoft trundling in with vows to chase Google and Yahoo in the lucrative venue.

As if that recent news weren’t embarrassing enough, now Microsoft has announced it’s about to chase down the iPod with its own Billy-come-lately hand-held music and video player.

And tune into the amazing innovation it brings to the fingertips. Microsoft's player will have at least one feature the iPod doesn’t: wireless Internet capability. So those who express a preference for the device at the cash register will be able to download music without being connected to a PC.

Tres strange, is it not, that Microsoft longed so for any advantage it would present us with a feature that encourages users away from the PC, which is, thanks to various fortuitous stumblings and cheapenings, its home turf.

But let’s not be unfairly critical and admit that the wondrous innovation will also feature a more advanced video screen.

In fact, let’s be proactively fair, as we always strive to be, and mention that Apple is not above imitation, either. For instance, after years of counterproductive soul searching, Jobs and crew finally figured out they could sell a lot more computers if theirs were compatible with the software that controls 90% of the world’s desktops. So in went Intel.

The only outfit that seems bent on sending the creative flame burning across the page in an uncompromising way is Goggle. But let’s not let its inventive duo of founders wiggle off the hook without a bit of a dunk in the wide waters of imitation. As we’ve all learned, one of Google The Great’s lastest forefronts is offering programs via the Internet that manage the same tasks the software does that Microsoft sells on a disk. How stunning is that innovation?

But taking Apple, Google, and Yahoo to task amounts to relative quibbles.

The seemingly hopeless wait is for the advent of at least one revelatory idea from Microsoft. Considering the host of accomplished techies they have in their employ, the most extraordinary astonishment is that we’re still experiencing only flagging anticipation.

Digg del.icio.us Blink Stumble Spurl Reddit Netscape Furl

Article keywords: humor, comedy, satire, political satire, laugh, joke, news, news laugh, newslaugh, laughs, laughter, spoof, spoofs, skit, skits

Article Source: http://www.articles2k.com

Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway and has written comedy for TV. Critics have called his writing ""delightfully funny" and "witty" with "good, genuine laughs."

Top Humor Articles
1). Easy Ways To Save Money & Abundance Revisited By : Roger Soverhead A penny saved is a penny earned so they say. Today most people want to save all the pennies they can, in fact if you look after the pennies the "p
2). Sun Will Only Burn For 5 Billion More Years; Humans Express Concern By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com We are often reminded that the sun will only shine in a way that can support life way out here on the earth for only about another five billion years. Sensing the eventuality of the cataclysm, we’re easily inclined to express our concern, along with our sympathetic distress for those far-off folks who will be standing on the earth when old Father Sol begins to turn down the heat.
3). ON THE IMPORTANCE OF ELEPHANTS By : Theolonius McTavish Copyright Theolonius McTavish 2004. ON THE IMPORTANCE OF ELEPHANTS-- Or, can you tell me where I can find “Babar”, “Dumbo” or “Topsy”? --
4). By Now, I'm a Expert at Memory Loss By : David Leonhardt I sat down to write my weekly humor column, but I just could not remember what I wanted to write about. This seems to be an increasingly more common a
5). Ken Lay Explains Behavior With Poem From Childhood: "Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep." By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com Ken Lay, the famously charming Texan from dirt-poor beginnings, who rose to be the toast of Houston before Enron, the company he founded, became toast, finally took the stand this week and, as expected, performed in his winning manner. He based his defense for the debacle that occurred under his chairmanship on a poem that he maintains has shaped his behavior since his mother first read it to him when he was just wee high to an oil pump.
6). Inner Peace By : Unknown By following the simple advice heard on The Dr. Phil show, I have finally found inner peace.Dr.Phil proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace
7). Hockey Summer Season; Will Be Played On Roller Skates By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com Professional hockey associations, long mournful of the unfortunately seasonal nature of their game, have decided to give the boys of summer a run for their money. To effect the balmy transformation, the teams will transform their footwear from ice skates to roller skates. The players are not entirely comfortable with the proposal. One star expressed concern, saying, “I’m really good on ice skates, but I never even put on a pair of roller skates.
8). Just Say No To Sex By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com (Extended spoof, presented In 10 installments of 4 pages each. This is the second installment; previous ones are included on this site, in case you miss one.) "They all seem impressively genuine in their intentions," Dr. Coburn replied. "As young people are prone to do, they actually want to do their part to help save the world – and now they see a practical way to proceed.
9). Thick Mick's Curriculum Vitae. By : Thick Mick. When I was born, I nearly died!The vet said that I was too thick for the average pelvis, whatever that is.My schoolteacher (bless her)
10). Hercule Phallus and Early Viagra. By : Thick Mick Viagra; latin-ish for re-enforce, derived from the Greek veristrongViagra also means metasplint; meta from the Greek hidden a

New Humor Articles
1). Are You Spreading Humor By : David Hill My first thought upon seeing the subject, "Are you sharing humor?" was that it referred to comics or orators. After giving some thought to the subject I began to see that each one of us, at sometime or other, should share our humor.
2). The Party Store By : Matt Allen Every now and then I like to frequent our local liquor store to stock my bar. Our neighborhood store is nothing special, but has what I need when I need it. I have never paid a whole lot of attention to the sign as I entered the establishment. The sign clearly states that not only do they sell beer and wine, they also sell party supplies. Great. You never know when a party may break out and having a store with party supplies at your disposal is nothing but a posititve thing.
3). An Efficient Commute By : Matt Allen This morning, as usual, I was pressed for time. I had to be to my "9 to 5" especially early and I woke up late. Instead of rushing around more than I already had been, I thought I would take the time to finish my "getting ready for work rituals" in the car. After all, I have seen countless others in my rearview mirror and beside me in their cars do the same, so why can't I? As I grabbed my things, I raced out to the car and started on the 32-minute commute to work.
4). Theory Of Evolution Challenged By French Chef; Cites Role Of Food And Wine By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com While The Theory of Evolution has received numerous challenges since Darwin proposed it, none seems to have taken the scientific community with such devastating surprise as the theory recently proposed by a French Chef from Bordeaux. The Chef, Andre Dumier, who operates a One Star Michelin restaurant just outside the city of Bordeaux, advanced the theory after contemplating what he considers the first requirement in the various stages of evolution – the availability of food.
5). Dick Cheney Enrolls At Dale Carnegie; Updates Curriculum By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com Vice President Cheney, upon his return from a visit to former Soviet Bloc nations, during which he criticized Russian President Putin in unusually direct, if correct, terms, found himself suffering from shortness of breath. Hesitant about consulting a doctor immediately, he performed a self-diagnosis and realized that his condition was due primarily to putting his foot in his mouth with alarming frequency.
6). Movie Stars As Sources Of Wisdom By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com Why do many people look to movie stars for answers to some of life's most challenging questions? While we have great respect for the art of acting, as explicated from Stanislavsky to Strasberg, the latter of whom we knew well and were fond of, we have never understood how the usual snippets who decide to become actors ascend in the minds of the public.
7). Democrats Search For Platform; Find It In FDR's Basement By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com The Democratic Party, sensing electoral weakness in the war-ravaged Republican Party, began an intensive search for a platform that might lead to a rejuvenation of their own habitually unfocused and widely unattractive party. Apparently, they have finally grown alert to the inadequate support provided by the random planking that has been delivered to them by various political strategists – usually, they now see, not deeply resonating and indubitably ethical ideas, but hardly more than sound bytes based on evanescent hot topics.
8). Oil Exploration Update: U. S. To Play Catch-Up With Cuba By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com Startlingly enough, it looks as if the time will soon arrive when the USA will have to play catch-up with Cuba in oil exploration. The diminutive and destitute communist enclave that serves as Fidel Castro’s personal cigar plantation now realizes that it has enough oil reserves under its coastal waters to prop up its no-go economy for decades and, incapable.
9). Bill Clinton In Secret Talks With Hillary; Agrees To Run For Vice President By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com Former President Bill Clinton has been holding secret talks with his wife and wannabe President Hillary and has, the rumor mill informs us, agreed to be her Vice Presidential candidate. In an exclusive interview, he confided, “Even though I want to help Hillary in every way I can, it wasn't an easy decision. After all, if you remember, I was the President.
10). Come Out With Your Checkbook Open By : Tom Attea/NewsLaugh.com Joey, daring the spotlights that were scanning the warehouse in which he was holed up, took a quick look out the window at the crowd below, and shouted, “Never, you dirty, rotten bill collectors!” Then he ducked back to the haven beneath the sill. He recently got more into debt than usual – in fact, he found himself surrounded by it – and he was having a restless dream about the multitude of bill collectors who were haunting his mind.