Anger and Guilt: The Perfect Marriage - Stress Management Article

By:CHARLES M. BONASERA

For many of us, anger is a very difficult emotion to experience and deal with in a satisfactory manner. Recently, on several network t.v. shows as well as on the internet, anger management has been a “hot topic”. Courts are now referring offenders whose infractions are “anger based” for therapy as part of the disposition of their cases. On the other hand, some people enjoy watching people on t.v. becoming enraged as a form of entertainment.

We were taught that anger is wrong both to experience as an emotion let alone to express it. And then, there are some of us who were taught that anger is a “sin” which needed to be confessed. Indeed, anger is a multi-faceted feeling that is oftentimes misconstrued and which can cause many problems in our lives. As an evaluator for DWI offenses, there were a number of people who experience “road rage”. Among some of the sayings that I have heard people express with respect to anger are “Don’t get angry, get even”; “The man who loses his temper, loses the argument”; “Well, I don’t see why you’re so upset”.

Although most programs dealing with anger management are generally adequate and offer “tips” on how to identify and deal with “anger patterns”, I have not found any that correlate the issue of anger with feelings of guilt. I believe that it is extremely important for people who are concerned with such problems/issues as anger cycles, depression, fears, road rage, managing stress, the issue of responsibility, forgiveness and healing to understand the role that guilt plays in remedying these problems.

What I have found in my psychotherapy practice is that many, if not most, people associate anger with feelings of rejection or abandonment and therefore are quite afraid of feeling or expressing anger. As a result, they will tend to repress or suppress their anger, which results, in their experiencing a number of problems both personally as well as in relationships. I have found that the most significant “byproduct” of repressed anger is depression. It seems that most people suffering from depression have developed a pattern of repression of their anger over a lengthy period of time that can interfere with many aspects of their lives. It affects the way they think, feel and act.

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Article keywords: anger, depression, wrong, guilt, road rage, fears, repression, expression, sin, stress, forgivness, think, feel, act

Article Source: http://www.articles2k.com

After 40 years of professional psychotherapeutic practice including work with many different sports representations, Charles Bonasera is now a consultant, author and workshop presenter. He has written a book of his compilation of sayings entitled "Mojo Symphony of Thoughts" and has a CD/book entitled "The Mental Side of Golf". Upcoming works are "Competition: A Guide for Parents and Coaches" as well as his book "How In The Hell Did This Happen To Me?" His website is www.charlesbonasera.com.

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