What Makes a Male a Man? A Woman Shares Her Thoughts

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By:Deborrah Cooper

I remember reading somewhere a quote on manhood that reads "Make it a life rule to give your best to whatever passes through your hands. Stamp it with your manhood. Let superiority be your trademark."

That quote pretty much sums things up. To women, simply being male does not entitle you to become a card carrying member of the Manhood Club. There are specific characteristics and qualities that women look for before they proudly refer to you as their "man."

First, let's eliminate sex when trying to compile a definition of a man. Sex isn't everything and a relationship based totally on sex is nothing special. A male that knows how to utilize his tool certainly does not make him a man. You see, a sorry, selfish, irresponsible, lazy man could be the ultimate lover. Sex should be the last component in the definition because those skills can be developed by the couple within their relationship. Working on it together can lead to an awesome experience. In other words sex does not make the man.

So the question then becomes what do women really want? The answer is a complete package, which includes the traits and qualities listed below:

Ambitious/Strong/Assertive
An ambitious man is a successful man because he strives for the best, no matter what his goals are. Strength does not necessitate muscles but inner strength. He is able to reach inside, draw from that strength when it is needed and share it if the need arises. He goes after what he wants without stepping on feet or toes but maneuvers around them.

Responsible
He knows his responsibilities and owns up to them, whether it is family, work, and commitments. A man recognizes that mistakes are a part of life. He admits to them, doesn't blame others or make excuses for his inconsistencies. He learns from them and acts accordingly.

Understanding
Recognizes that no one is perfect, including himself. Encourages communication efforts to resolve important issues. Realizes the final say does not have to go one way (especially his way) or another, but knows that a compromise is always a possibility.

In Tune With Himself
He has self-awareness spiritually and mentally. He loves self, takes care of himself but is able to love others as well. He can hold a decent conversation with anyone and he knows how to express himself in any given conversation. He is respected by others and recognizes that in order to get respect, you have to give it. He can accept constructive criticism without taking it personally and recognizes that opinion is individual and each is entitled to his or hers.

Compassion
He is unselfish and caring of others around him. He is neither self-centered nor egotistical. He thinks of others, and the feelings of others. Men are told from day one that men are not suppose to cry because it is a display weakness. Crying makes them human, and it has nothing to do with strength. It has to do with feeling. The lack of fear in showing true feelings constitutes strength and courage.

Relationships and Love
* He is caring giving, honest, loyal and respects the lady in his life
* He is willing to work things out together
* He respects his mate as his other half
* He knows that sharing is essential, good bad whatever
* The word commitment is not taken lightly and he doesn't make one unless he is sure that is what he wants to do. He will be the first to admit it.
* The woman in his life is there to support and encourage. He appreciates it and shows it
* He works with her, for her, towards common goals no matter what they are

Women love compliments, doors opened and chairs pulled out for us. A little pampering does a body good. For example: a little shoulder massage after a tiring day at work is comforting.

A man recognizes that chivalry is not dead. He is a gentleman. He does not take for granted he is loved. He expresses it and let his woman know that he loves her as well. Love is appreciated and not taken lightly. The work needed to maintain a relationship is done willingly and cooperatively

Each woman's definition of a man encompasses many different qualities, and each woman has her own standards. Certainly my list is not a listing of the only qualities of manhood, but it is definitely a start.

Some might feel it is unrealistic to expect to have a man that is worthy of such admiration and respect, and provides such devotion. I say that there is no perfection in anyone, but for someone to be human, loving, caring is very close.

To all the solid, loving, honorable and hardworking men out there, I salute you!

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Article keywords: manhood, men, love, relationships, what makes a man, commitment, dating, marriage, male psychology

Article Source: http://www.articles2k.com

Deborrah has authored dozens of relationship articles and writes a weekly advice column using the pen name "Ms. HeartBeat." Her work appears on the website Ask HeartBeat!, which focuses on modern relationships of both teens and adults. Her dating guide Sucka Free Love! provides witty, street-smart and hilarious insight into the toughest issues facing singles today. Order your copy today!